Dear Melissa Ambrosini,

As always when I pen a *letter to someone – stranger or loved one – I always actually feel the calling to do so. For to begin a soulful conversation one must always be in the present moment entirely and completely don’t you agree? And you have to feel your words. A letter, for me, demands the same attention and respect (or more so) as looking someone direct in the eye and speaking truth. A one sided well thought out and beautiful exchange (and gift) of scripted emotions and thoughts to honour.

Even though I had seen your request (and competition) for people to share with you the biggest lessons they had received from reading your new book – Mastering Your Mean Girl With Melissa Ambrosini – I literally had no intention of writing to you 10 minutes ago, and perhaps never would have penned a response/letter to you ever – had the inner urge and powerful pull not simply arrived at my heart.

Unannounced, It led me here.

And so whilst I’ve missed the competition deadline date it was more important for me to write to you when it felt right and through spontaneity alone.

As I write, I am sat on my balcony enjoying the first (please not the last) of the British summer sunshine. Birds chirupp in my ears and I gaze around my surrounding in awe. It is not always that I feel this state of zen. But when it surfaces it is bliss. It makes it effortless to get into the creative flow. I cannot help but write in this space. Cannot help but let the pen take over me… (Ive written more about this total immersive writing style before HERE.)

In my hands is a copy of your beautiful book which I have been avidly immersed in over the last few days. As I satisfyingly draw towards the final close, I idly flick back through the pages and re-read the paragraph in which you invite women to get in touch with someone they admire….. and the knowing to write to you gets a little stronger… I’ll just do it.


The sweet chapter on Love and your personal relationship with Nick was the trigger which compelled me the most, and something – a little like relief – just pinged inside me as I was invited to immerse in your experience. Through your words I unintentionally discovered a missing piece within my own semi-formed feelings around this topic… It is like you succinctly (and unwittingly) added the element which has now made my own musings and beliefs coherent and concrete…

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I love it when all the mental swirlings form some kind of clarity.

And so I simply want to Thank you for sharing and for inspiring Melissa. For giving us hope that true love does exist and that (more importantly) there is no shame in believing so. That is what came together for me.

I am not in a relationship, and my own health limitations make it all a little more complex perhaps. I’m okay with this as long as I believe that one day it will happen. At the right time. As time has gone by I’m grateful that I know myself enough now so that when I do hopefully meet the one he will be the one who is right for me. That we will have both reached a place of personal evolution so that we add to one another’s life. I never quite truly and fully understood this before and you have managed to make it that extra bit shiny clear to me.

I am not delusional but reading your story I can now (unashamedly) raise my hand and say that yes ‘fairy tales do exist’…. Just read Melissa’s story for evidence.

It is so refreshing to hear a positive love story. I think I needed some evidence to back up my beliefs and hopes.

There is still hesitation in saying that belief out loud. Fear that I will be mocked for expecting too much or being naive still exists…… And actually yes, fairy tales are silly. The ones we grew up anyway, where the Princess waits and waits for her Prince before her life can begin, and before she can experience happiness. That is not what I believe at all.

Your story reinforces what actually I do hold true. That fairy tales and love stories are real and possible – but – within a new re-framed context. Within this altered blueprint the love affair is still as magnificent and the feelings still oh so sweet, but crucially the Princess (and the Prince for that matter) are already happy and full-filled – or working towards it individually anyway – before (or sometimes whilst) they form a union.

For this is the missing element in the traditional fable isn’t it? Finding happiness within instead of seeking it through another. From here the joy and bliss of a partnership (allbeit it with continued and ongoing effort) is the golden bonus. Yay.

I think maybe the classic story tale need to be rewritten?

Maybe I should do that actually? Cue interesting project thoughts commencing already in my head…..

Actually, funnily enough A PSYCHIC ONCE TOLD ME THAT I WOULD WRITE A CHILDREN’S BOOK. Perhaps I should follow the crumbs. You never know. Certainly I desire a new story version for my Niece Princess Amelia and my Nephew Prince Hugo to grow up reading. For them to know that they dont need a Prince/Princess to be happy, but that finding the right partner, at the right time, will cement their bliss greatly and fulfil an innate human destiny and experience.

Thanks once again for re-fuelling and reigniting the confidence to believe in the happy-ever-after. And for also inspiring creativity and ideas within me. I didn’t expect the latter, but it rose organically through the very processing of penning this letter to you…..


My own somewhat shy (and vulnerable) declaration is that I would like to meet a man aligned with my path. One who has worked on himself and is open. One who believes in happiness and kindness, and fully supporting their life partner to become the best version of themselves. I want to give this back to him too. Basically, it just has to feel right in each and every cell in my body. There has to be a ‘hell yeah’ as you would perhaps say?

I do believe that alongside all the compromises and work and reality, that ultimately being with someone (even within a friendship) should add to your life rather than detract. Many will still say that this is all blue sky dreaming, and they heighten our fears of risking what could be. Perhaps you do miss out on a family, or maybe another path shows up instead? None of us really knows. But the choice itself – to follow your heart – is an deserved entitlement.

To be honest, my long term health issues (see HERE) have almost allowed me to know what I need and what I truly desire so much more. Older and wiser (and a little weary) my perception is altered. All I know is that my situation is, as it is, and now it is even more crucial that I only hold hands with the right person. I hope that I will recognise when this person does come into my life and be brave enough to allow it to unfold as it should.

You’ve made me really think Melissa, as the best writers do and I declare that I want a grown up kind of love too, and am now proud to admit this and admit my belief in it being possible. Your joy radiates outwards and is infectious and inspiring. Quite simply Thank You for all you shared,
Love + WishesCarlyxxx

* I believe that letters are a scared sharing between 2 people. That both the writer and the recipient equally own the scribe. To be kept sacred unless permission from both sides is granted. When the content is vulnerable I always ask permission to share – as I did in this letter HERE to Alanna. This, however, is an open letter and review of Melissa’s book and is mindfully written for this purpose. Therefore, whilst I have sent a copy to Melissa I also believe the content may be comfortably shared here with you knowing it is nothing Melissa has not already shared herself. xx

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2 Comments on An Open Letter: Reflecting on Love & Mastering Your Mean Girl with Melissa Ambrosini

  1. Melissa Ambrosini
    September 1, 2016 at 11:48 pm (9 months ago)

    So beautiful. Thanks for sharing angel 😉

    Reply
    • Carly
      September 3, 2016 at 2:39 pm (9 months ago)

      Thanks so much for reading/replying Melissa 🙂 xx

      Reply

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